| Story Views | |
| Now: | |
| Last Hour: | |
| Last 24 Hours: | |
| Total: | |
I have learned…
It’s all fun and games until someone looses an eye.
Do it yourself circumcise kits are really a bad idea.
A firecracker will never replace Ex-lax
Don’t go to a dentist that you see vice-grips and a staff with less teeth than you
Stay out of trees so you won’t break your neck.
Bundle up so as not to catch pneumonia
Always wear clean underwear if case of a crash.
If you throw underwear at a wall and they stick but fall after a few seconds, good for another day, No fall no wear.
A flashlight will burn, until you need it to.
Stay away from hookers that take EBT cards.
Look before zipping.
Don’t try suicide with a cheap slingshot.
If a cop pulls you over never try to bribe with a doughnut unless you have a hot light to.
Picking up a random lady at closing time, one’s life can go from happy, happy, happy, to crabby, crabby, crabby, overnight.
Never, NEVER pee on an electric fence.
When someone yells “Hey Bubba, watch this!” Be sure you have a camera.
The shin is a God Given tool to find furniture in a blackout
Don’t give a cat a bath
2013-02-20 12:51:28
Source:
