How to Remain a Zombie-slave in Five Easy Steps

“We have met the enemy, and he is us.” ~ Walt Kelly

Have you ever caught yourself thinking that maybe the examined life isn’t for you? That becoming the best possible version of yourself sounds like way too much work? That perhaps the pursuit of enlightenment is for the birds and maybe MLK’s dream is nothing more than a pipe dream?

And all that peaceful warrior, rainbow warrior, and infinite player talk is just highfalutin psychobabble? Then this article is just for you. So kick back, relax, and forget about all those self-improvement articles. Here are five easy steps to remaining a zombie-slave. Brains not included.

1) Stop questioning authority
“Disobedience is the true foundation of liberty. The obedient must be slaves.” ~ Henry David Thoreau