GFP Newsletter – 8/24/2015

There was once a jew – Ohrenstein – who used to go to the rabbi with all his problems. Periodically he would go to the rabbi and ask him: what shall I do about my wife, what should I do about my business, what should I do about this, what should I do about that; my son-in-law is misbehaving, what should I do about it, rabbi, and so on…. Each time Ohrenstein came with one of his many problems, the rabbi would listen patiently and courteously, and then he would fulfill Ohrenstein's eager expectations by giving him some advice or making a suggestion. Ohrenstein always went away beaming, invariably told his friends about the wonderful advice the rabbi had given him, and within a week was back with a new problem and asking for more advice.

Finally, the rabbi's patience began to run out. Enough is enough, even for a courteous and loving rabbi. But what to do about it? Ohrenstein was a perfectly good and sincere man.

One day Ohrenstein came with an unusually big problem. He had fallen in love with a girl; his wife had found out about it; he could not leave the girl, but he did not want to disappoint his wife. On and on he went: the girl this, his wife that, and so on. He talked for two hours, and finally, at the end, he asked, “Rabbi, give me some advice, what should I do?”

“Hmm,” the rabbi pondered and tapped on the table as though he were deep in thought. Finally he said, “I have some advice to give you, but I am afraid it may hurt your feelings, you may feel offended by it, so I don't know if I should really give you any advice this time. “

“Hurt my feelings?” Ohrenstein exclaimed. “Rabbi, you can say anything to me!”

“Okay,” said the rabbi, “then my advice is you convert to Christianity, let yourself be baptized and start going to confession.

“What on earth are you saying, Rabbi?” Ohrenstein exclaimed, shocked. “Have you gone out of your mind?”

“Not at all,” the rabbi replied. “You let yourself be baptized and start going to confession, and then you can drive some stupid parish priest crazy and not me!”

-Rajneesh

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