Letting Go of Guilt

By Marcia Sirota, MD

Maybe you’ve felt them yourself; the painful, recurrent pangs of guilt? Maybe you’ve wanted to do something but stopped yourself, because you were held back by guilt? Maybe you’ve felt compelled to do something that you didn’t really want to do, because guilt made you do it? If this is you, or someone you know, then read on.

Guilt seems to be an epidemic these days, and it’s plaguing the lives of so many people. I often hear stories of how guilt is controlling someone’s most important life choices. Strangely, guilt isn’t even a natural emotion.

The truth is, guilt is a learned reaction; a negative feeling about ourselves that’s associated with something we’re about to do or that we’ve done.

We might think that that guilt comes from deep inside us, but really, guilt is always about the fear of displeasing or disappointing someone; someone who has an agenda that we feel compelled to fulfill.