White House Dossier Sort of Obtains Hillary’s Private Emails

Thursday, March 12, 2015 20:59

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You were killing me with that pantsuit today.

Oh, stop.

No really.

Oh do go on.

I mean, I really liked the salmon one. But hospital green is just your color.

I think you’re right.

It matches your eyes.

My eyes are blue.

Okay. Well, you know what I mean.

Oh, Bill. You’re so romantic.

I know.

What do you mean we’re in Tunisia?

Well, the plane just landed, and I’m here on the tarmac waiting to greet you.

But we’re supposed to be in Oman.

Well, if that’s you in the third window from the front, wave.

Okay

You’re in Tunisia.

Holy f&*^ing sh&*.

The President of Tunisia is also out here waiting for you. He has three hours of meetings scheduled with you and a banquet.

F&^$ that. We’re taking off for Oman. I don’t even know who the president of Tunisia is or what the Hell to talk to him about.

This is going to cause a diplomatic incident.

That’s what I have you for. I’m ordering the pilot to take off.

Why isn’t my water under the lectern?

I don’t know. I told Tom to put it there.

Well you know I’m about to go on and you know I can’t f&*^ing speak if I don’t have water under the lectern. What kind of stupid moron are you?

Well, I can run and get you a bottle.

I’m thirsty now you freak. I don’t want to wait until you go find some water. And you know it has to be Evian.

We have Poland Spring

Poland f&*^ing Spring? Are you kidding me? Who do you think I am, the Queen of White Trash? Get me Evian or Fiji Water.

Forget it. I quit, you witch.

You can’t f&*^ing quit until you find me some Fiji Water.

Hello?????

Get me some Fiji Water. Now!!! I’m going to have you arrested.

Anyone there???

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