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Out….Of….Control!

I’m going to use my sister-in-law today…(Tara, I hope you’re good with that!)

She’s always been little! Even pregnant, that girl was itty bitty. 

Since that’s always been the same through the years, I thought I’d show how much I had actually changed! 

When you’re big you never realize exactly how bad it is. Only looking back do I understand how out of control it was. 

I can remember looking through our Easter pictures that year. It was the first time Tara and I cooked Easter dinner together and we were pretty proud of ourselves. Of course we wanted a picture of all our hard work as proof! I was shocked and embarrassed when I saw how big I was standing next to her. I actually remember cropping a little off the right side of this picture before sharing it. That was devastating to me. 

Now I am not hiding. I’m not cropping and editing. 

I’m not where I want to be just yet, but I still feel pretty dang good. 

Know something else I realize? 

My hair is always a hot mess! 

UGH!

Not only did I not care about my body, I stopped caring about my hair and my makeup. 

I really let myself go. When you think about it, that’s just plain sad. 

Some days I am so afraid that I’ll give up and go back to the unhealthy version of me. That terrifies me. I don’t ever want that to happen to me again. I was miserable and I didn’t even know that about myself at the time. I thought it was normal. I had actually accepted that as my life. 

I deserve so much more.

2013-04-05 12:02:28

Source: http://www.dailydoseofdelsignore.com/2013/04/ooc.html